It's Thursday

 It's a Thursday, late morning, and I'm struggling to find a push to write today. 

Yesterday, while typing my blog, I had a wonderful Idea to about what I should post tomorrow (today). And in the process, I failed at both yesterdays post and doomed today to failure. At least in my own head this will be a failure. Though I suppose all of my posts, in my own opinion, are failures. So the mere act of writing the posts are wins in my way.

There's an odd feeling I seem to deal with most every day. That feeling is failure. I rarely feel I am good enough in what I am doing. From work to play, art to shopping, even opinions to talking I feel completely inadequate and not good enough. I like to think everyone suffers this same feeling but I'm sure that is not the case. 

I have had many managers and bosses who always seem to feel confident in their abilities and they all made sure you were aware of how not good you are. I think It's also fair to assume my feelings on this subject are not exactly how they were in reality. I am sure I am over critical of myself, took the offensive comments to heart and ignored the positives. At times I worry it makes me seem ungrateful, lost, or unappealing for future employers. Is this something that other people experience? 

I try to stay positive. Some days I feel like i could run coca cola, other days, i feel like running the dishwasher is beyond me. 

let's see what tomorrow brings. 

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